Tag: aew dark results

AEW Dark results: Kenny Omega & Riho vs. Kip Sabian & Penelope Ford

Posted on by Ethan Renner

Tonight’s episode is available to watch below:

Tony Schiavone welcomed us to Cleveland for the start of this week’s Dark. He talked about the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, then threw it to Taz and Excalibur. 

JUNGLE BOY & MARKO STUNT DEFEATED SONNY KISS & BRANDON CUTLER

Cutler has undergone a gimmick makeover since I last saw him on Dynamite. He’s painted his face, changed up his gear, and rolls a Dungeons and Dragons dice during his entrance. 

Stunt and Cutler began. Stunt did a couple of comedy spots. Jungle Boy tagged in and used a springboard arm drag. Kiss tagged in and hit a triple back handspring into a back elbow in the corner, then a handspring into an axe kick. Very impressive. 

Jungle Boy made a comeback, again hitting springboard arm drags. Stunt tagged in and got cut off by Cutler. Cutler hit a black hole slam for a near fall. Kiss tagged in. Stunt used a tijeras. Kiss sat down into a cradle for a two count. 

Jungle Boy got a hot tag. Cutler tagged in as well. Jungle Boy used a standing Muta lock. Kiss interfered, but got tossed over the top rope. Stunt tagged in, hit a flipping stunner off the top, then pinned Cutler. 

The finish was a little clunky, but this was alright. 

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Brandi Rhodes visited a therapist. I think I know this therapist. Hi, Teil!

The therapist talked Brandi through her issues with the Nightmare Collective. She encouraged her to let go of the Collective, to let go of all the criticism of her on Twitter. Brandi was hallucinating, seeing subliminal messages from the therapist. Brandi left, passing a stuffed animal on the couch where the therapist had been sitting. 

I think Brandi might be hallucinating and talking to a stuffed animal? I’m not sure. We’ll have to see how this plays out.

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HIKARU SHIDA DEFEATED MEL

Mel was accompanied by Dr. Luther and Kong. 

Mel attacked Shida at the opening bell. Kong used a kendo stick shot on Shida from the floor while Mel took the referee. 

Mel continued the attack on Shida in the corner. Shida low-bridged Mel to the floor. Shida pulled a chair from under the ring to use as a launch pad for a knee strike. Luther jumped in Shida’s path and took the knee strike for Mel, allowing Mel to regain the edge over Shida. 

Back in the ring, Mel hit a slam. Shida escaped a vertical suplex attempt and hit an enzuigiri. Shida then hit a vertical suplex. Shida hit a missile dropkick for a near fall. Mel came back with a black hole slam, then hit a standing leg drop for a two count. 

Mel tried a chokeslam, but Shida used a victory roll for a near fall. Mel then used a crucifix for a two count. Shida used a judo hip toss for a takedown, then hit a running knee for a two count. 

Luther jumped on the apron and took the ref. Kong tried for a kendo stick shot. Shida ducked, and Kong hit Mel. Shida then used the kendo stick on Kong. 

Mel dead-weighted Shida on a falcon arrow, but Shida got a two count off of it. Shida then hit a running knee strike for the pin. 

After the match, Kong and Luther were brow beating Mel for losing. Kong slapped Mel in the back of the head. Luther then grabbed Kong. Mel hit Kong with strikes, then whipped Kong through a section of the barricade. 

Mel sent Kong into the steps. Mel hit a leg drop off the apron to Kong on the steps and they both crashed to the floor. Luther and Mel left with their arms raised. 

Shida was good in this match. Mel is green, but she has size and moves well. She just needs more ring time.

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Schiavone previewed the upcoming schedule, then threw it to the intergender match from the Jericho Cruise. 

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KENNY OMEGA & RIHO DEFEATED KIP SABIAN & PENELOPE FORD

This was a great match, and I’m sure it was even better live. The production values here hurt the presentation, as a shaky handheld camera on the floor provided the only footage. This is the best I’ve ever seen Ford look in the ring. 

Sabian and Omega began. Ford demanded a tag immediately. She slapped Omega. Omega teased tagging out but decided to face Ford instead. 

They locked up. They traded left arm holds. Ford used a side headlock takeover. Omega used a headscissors takeover. Ford used a handstand escape and tagged out. Sabian ducked under an attempt to lock up and called for Riho, so Omega tagged out. 

Riho began to get the best of a chain wrestling sequence, so Sabian hit a strike. Riho came back with arm drags and teased a slam. Sabian countered with a slam. Riho slipped out of another slam attempt, then tagged out. 

Omega hit Sabian with chops, then used a running powerslam for a near fall. Omega hit a suplex. Riho tagged in for a double stomp, then used a single-leg crab. Sabian forced a rope break. Omega tagged back in. Omega and Riho did some double team spots. Omega hit a Kotaro Krusher for a near fall. 

Riho tagged in and hit a series of chops. Sabian raked her eyes and tagged out. Ford hit Riho with chops, then stomped her down in the corner. Sabian got a tag and hit a back suplex, then used a camel clutch. Omega broke up the hold. Ford jumped in and dragged Riho back to the Superbad corner. 

Sabian tagged in and Riho hit a tijeras. Riho rolled through and hit a double stomp, then tagged Omega. Omega hit you can’t escape, then hit a brainbuster for a near fall. Riho got a tag. Omega hit a snap rana. Riho hit a top rope headscissors, then hit a high cross off the top for a two count. 

Omega tagged in. Sabian avoided a buckle bomb and hit an enzuigiri. Ford tagged in for a handspring back elbow and a high kick. Sabian tagged in for a missile dropkick . Ford hit a codebreaker into a leg drop from Sabian. 

Omega blocked a tornado DDT from Sabian, then hit a V-Trigger. Riho and Ford tagged in. Ford hit a stunner for a near fall. Ford missed a handspring attack. Riho hit a knee strike and a Northern Lights suplex for a near fall. 

Ford avoided a double stomp off the top. Both tagged out. Omega hit a snap dragon suplex. He went for a V-Trigger. Sabian pulled the referee in his path. Omega held up. Ford jumped in and hit a low blow to Omega. 

The match broke down and all four jumped in. Riho hit a snap dragon on Sabian. Omega blocked a stunner from Ford, then hit her with a snap dragon. Riho used a crucifix hold on Sabian, allowing Omega to hit a V-Trigger. Omega hit another V-Trigger, then used the One Winged Angel for the pin. 

Omega cut a promo after the match. He said wrestling has been around forever, there have been Royal Rumbles, Survivor Series, and a ton of different matches. He said what you’ve just seen is the latest evolution. 

Omega said that it wasn’t that long ago that it was said there would be no mixed tag matches in AEW. But today, you’ve just seen that the world is expanding and anything is possible. He put over Riho, then Ford and Sabian, then bid us goodbye and good night, bang. 

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Lexy interviewed Dr. Samson who was examining Kong. He said Kong suffered a herniated disc in the attack by Mel and will be out indefinitely.

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Tully Blanchard and Shawn Spears entered. Tully cut a promo. He said he and Spears are still looking for a tag team partner for Spears. They found one who looks good on paper, but the work in the ring is the real test. Tully introduced Colin Delaney. 

BEST FRIENDS DEFEATED SHAWN SPEARS & COLIN DELANEY

Orange Cassidy accompanied Best Friends. 

Spears and Trent began. They locked up. Trent hit the ropes, then landed with double knees on Spears. Spears rolled outside, then both tagged out. 

Chuck Taylor and Delaney did a series of teases and counters. Delaney hit a boot to the gut. Spears and Delaney had some miscommunication on a couple of spots. Best Friends hit stereo planchas. They teased hugging. Spears and Delaney cut them off. Delaney then wanted to hug Spears, but Spears turned him down. Spears hugged Tully instead. 

Delaney and Spears worked Taylor over in the corner. Spears hit a neckbreaker for a two count. Taylor finally managed a tag to Trent. Delaney tried a misdirection spot but ran into a lariat from Trent. Trent hit a swing DDT on Spears, then hit a tope con giro to Delaney. 

Trent hit Delaney with a top rope crossbody for a near fall. Delaney managed a DDT on Trent for his own near fall. Spears tagged in and did some crowd work. The crowd chanted for his old perfect ten gimmick. 

Taylor got a tag. Spears blocked a sole food. Taylor hit a sole food to Delaney into a half-and-half suplex by Trent. Taylor covered for a two count. Trent got a tag but got crotched on the top rope. Spears saved for Delaney, then tagged in. 

Spears teased a superplex on Trent. Trent fought it off, but got hit by a stunner from an interfering Delaney. Spears hit a C4 on Trent for a near fall. 

Things broke down. Trent, Taylor and Delaney got sent outside. Spears teased a dive. Cassidy jumped in the ring and distracted Spears. Trent pulled Spears outside, leaving Cassidy in the ring. Tully jumped in to square off with Cassidy. 

Tully and Cassidy both did the pockets spot. Cassidy hit his slow kicks to Tully. Spears jumped back in and sent Cassidy outside. 

Back to action, Delaney used a cradle on Trent for a near fall. Taylor hit a knee strike. The Best Friends hugged. Tully pulled Spears off the apron as he was going to climb in to help Delaney. Tully and Spears left, leaving Delaney to take the loss. 

Trent and Taylor hit Delaney with Strong Zero for the pin. Delaney joined Cassidy and Best Friends for a group hug after the match.

AEW Dark results: Nyla Rose vs. Shanna tables match

Posted on by Arya Witner

The Big News: Brandon Cutler did not get involved as his partner Sonny Kiss got destroyed, decimated, and defeated by The Dark Order in the main event.

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Tony Schiavone opened the episode on the Chris Jericho Rock ‘n’ Wrestling Rager at Sea and introduced the matches. Dasha Gonzales wasn’t on the show, but it was said she’d be back next week.

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Nyla Rose defeated Shanna in a tables match

This match was taped in Miami at the Bash at the Beach episode of Dynamite.

For the first time in AEW history, Jim Ross described a match as Bowling Shoe Ugly. The match wasn’t necessarily bad, but it did have some rough points, especially as it regarded Shanna trying to set up a table.

Shanna did a dive off the apron early on and attempted to push a table into the ring, but Rose shoved it into Shanna’s stomach, which sent her crashing into the guardrail. JR mentioned that he felt similar pain at the Cow Palace once, referencing the New Japan show where Jay White caused the announce desk to push into Ross, knocking him over. That’s also when Josh Barnett stood up and attempted to start a confrontation with White before being calmed down.

Shanna snapped off a hurricanrana, which popped the crowd and eventually the table was set up at ringside. While Rose was on the apron, Shanna leaped off the top rope, but got caught and chokeslammed through the table, giving the win to The Native Beast.

After the match, Rose pulled out a second table, but Sadie Gibbs ran in for the alleged save. Gibbs attempted a Space Flying Tiger Drop, but Rose moved. Gibbs tried to land on her feet, but she slipped and fell on her butt. Rose ran after her, beat her down, and then powerbombed Gibbs through the second table.

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Kip Sabian (w/ Penelope Ford) defeated QT Marshall

We were magically whisked away to the Caribbean as we were on the Jericho Cruise for this match. Sabian worked over Marshall’s arm for the majority of the match after Ford interfered, which allowed Sabian to gain the advantage.

Sabian decided to leave the ring and jaw-jack with some fans at ringside. Marshall made a brief comeback and hit some really nice slams, but this was not his night.

Marshall went for a senton, but Sabian maneuvered out of the way and slapped on an armbreaker and Marshall got the ropes. To play off Marshall’s entrance where he threw an apple into the crowd, Sabian grabbed an apple, but got a punch to the face for his troubles. Marshall went for a sunset flip, but Sabian sat down, fell forward, and grabbed the ropes for the win.

Sabian will go one-on-one with Cody on Dynamite tomorrow night.

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The Dark Order (Evil Uno & Stu Grayson) defeated Sonny Kiss & Brandon Cutler

Cutler and Peter Avalon are now in a race to see who can have the longest losing streak in AEW history. Avalon is currently in the lead, but Cutler is gaining on his tail. We flew back to Miami for this bout.

This show lasted 32 minutes and the bell to start the main event rang 28 minutes in, so needless to say this wasn’t an Iron Man match. Alex Reynolds and John Silver walked to the ring without their masks on and put them on before the match.

Kiss was attacked at the bell and spent the entirety of the brief bout in a failing attempt to fight back. Kiss did a slingshot split leg drop, which may have done more damage to him than Grayson. Uno speared Kiss on the ring apron and then Kiss was pinned after The Dark Order hit Fatality.

It was brought up at Cutler never tagged in. Kiss never got close enough to the corner to attempt the tag.

So that does it for this week. Thank you for reading and I presume we return to normal next week.

AEW Dark results: Tribute to legends of Memphis wrestling

Posted on by Arya Witner

Editor’s Note: You can watch tonight’s episode here.

The Big News: Father and son stood victorious at show’s end when Billy & Austin Gunn teamed up for the first time on AEW television and picked up the win over Shawn Spears & Peter Avalon.

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Excalibur and legendary Memphis announcer Dave Brown opened the show and ran down the matches we’re in store for before pitching it to Tony Schiavone and Dasha Gonzalez.

Schiavone and Gonzalez previewed our opening segment, then we were magically whisked away to it.

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All of the Memphis legends AEW was honoring were standing in the ring as things got started. Justin Roberts did a nice introduction for each person and they stepped up front for an acknowledgment.

Those acknowledged were Jimmy Valiant, Kevin Lawler (for his brother Brian Christopher), Dave Brown, Shane Russell (for his father Lance), Austin Idol, Doug Gilbert (for himself, his father Tommy, and his brother Eddie), The Rock & Roll Express, and Lanny Poffo (for himself, his father Angelo, and his brother Macho Man Randy Savage).

Savage and The Rock & Roll’s got the biggest reaction and then AEW did a 10-bell tribute to those who had passed away. Too bad this wasn’t on Dynamite as this was an excellent tribute and well worth going out of your way to see.

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Darby Allin defeated Brandon Cutler

Excalibur spent the early part of the match using Dave Brown to respond to critics of AEW by comparing some of the wackiness to the wackiness of Memphis. The one name Brown brought up was Flex Kavana, who would move on to become someone you guys may have heard of, The Rock.

Cutler hit a moonsault press and landed by crashing his knees on the top of Allin’s head. I had immediate flashbacks to DJZ and Jesse Sorensen from a TNA pay-per-view almost 10 years ago, but thankfully Allin was back up seconds later and seemed to be okay.

Cutler took most of the match, using his superior size to bully around Allin. Dave Brown said Allin may have been looking ahead to his match with PAC on Dynamite. Allin did hit a Code Red, but Cutler went for a springboard move. Allin sidestepped him, dropped him with a stunner, and hit a Coffin Drop for the win.

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Nyla Rose vs. Shanna never got started

Rose was headed to the ring for this grudge match. On multiple occasions in the past month, she has powerbombed Shanna through a table and Shanna was not happy with this. Shanna ran down and attacked Rose on the ramp.

They fought around ringside with Rose constantly trying to powerbomb Shanna outside of the ring. Rose set up a table outside the ring, but Shanna speared her through the ropes and they both crashed through the table.

Security and referees came down and carried them to the back. They both would occasionally make a half-hearted attempt to go after the other one, but they lived to fight another day.

**********

Suddenly we found ourselves backstage where Alex Marvez was attempting to interview Shanna. Shanna attempted to speak, but was attacked by Rose.

Rose threw some set pieces onto Shanna and then turned to the camera to cut a promo. Unfortunately for Rose, the same thing happened to her, as Shanna attacked her. This was when security ran in to break things up.

I think Shanna has a complaint to be made. Every time Rose attacked her, no one tried to break it up. As soon as Shanna made a move on Rose, security and referees ran in and stopped her both times.

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The Gunn Club (Austin & Billy Gunn) defeated Shawn Spears & Peter Avalon (w/ Tully Blanchard and Leva Bates)

Despite the match not airing at all, the match with the Gunn Club defeating Spears & Preston Vance does count towards their respective records.

Austin Gunn led the crowd into asking Billy to do his shtick. It might be walking the line of copyright infringement. Avalon did his usual cheap heat promo, this time saying that the food at Jerry Lawler’s restaurant was so bad that if you eat there you would die on the toilet like Elvis. He then called Austin “Ass Boy.”

There’s no better way to phrase this. Spears found himself on his knees — eye-to-eye with Billy’s crotch — after a brief back and forth. He then proceeded to stare at it until Billy told him to suck it.

Austin looked fine for someone so early into his career. He was green, obviously, but he held his own. He wasn’t on offense for long, but it was obvious what he did wasn’t as crisp as the others.

Austin sold forever and then made the hot tag to Billy. Billy ran wild, but Austin blind tagged himself in and hit the Famouser on Avalon for a two count. Finally, father and son picked up the win with a combination Cobra Clutch slam and Swanton Bomb.

Final Thoughts: The matches were your typical Dark fare. Nothing to write home about. However, the Memphis tribute was a very good opening 15 minutes to the show and — again — you should go watch it.

AEW Dark results: SCU vs. Kip Sabian & The Hybrid 2

Posted on by Arya Witner

The Big News: Christopher Daniels got back on the winning side of things, with SCU defeating Kip Sabian & The Hybrid 2 in the main event.

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After spending the weekend watching shows that started at midnight, 2 a.m. and 4:30 a.m., it’s almost weird to watch a show that starts at a normal time.

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The episode started abruptly with a recap of the Jon Moxley-Chris Jericho angle from last week’s Dynamite.

We got a brand new opening video package for Dark after, showing highlights of the first dozen episodes and featuring the wrestlers and acts you are most likely to see on Dark.

Chuck Taylor joined Excalibur at the broadcast table this week.

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The show only went 32 minutes and they only aired two matches. For some reason they did not air the Billy & Austin Gunn vs. Shawn Spears & Preston Vance match. Not sure why it didn’t air, but due to that the show was much shorter than usual.

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Awesome Kong (w/ Brandi Rhodes & Mel) destroyed Skyler Moore

Two matches this week and one of them featured the debuting Skyler Moore and the former TNA Knockouts Champion Awesome Kong. In case you aren’t sure, Mel is the fan who begged to have her head shaved on Dynamite a month ago.

The bell rang and it may as well have rang again immediately. Moore was overwhelmed from the beginning and never stood a chance. Kong hit a spinning back fist while Moore was on the top rope and then locked on a Torture Rack, which she turned into a slam.

Moore attempted to counter the Awesome Bomb, so Kong sat down on her. Kong mercifully got the pin with an Implant Buster.

It went three minutes, purely due to Kong and Brandi toying with Moore. Brandi ordered Mel into the ring and she dropped a leg on Moore.

No haircut this time.

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Alex Marvez interviewed Christopher Daniels ahead of SCU’s six-man tag. Marvez said this is the first time we’ve seen Daniels since his botch from a few weeks ago. His words, not mine. Daniels said Kip Sabian and TH2 are going to find out tonight that he still has plenty in his tank.

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Tony Schiavone and Dasha Gonzalez ran down all the cities AEW will be at soon.

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SoCal Uncensored (Christopher Daniels, Frankie Kazarian & Scorpio Sky) defeated Kip Sabian (w/ Penelope Ford) & The Hybrid 2 (Jack Evans & Angelico)

Excalibur accidentally called the heels “electri-flying,” which I think makes a better description of them than anything else. Anyway, it was main event time. SCU are 3-0 as a trios team in AEW, while TH2 and Sabian are 0-2 going into this bout.

Kazarian got the best of Sabian early. That did not please TH2, so they ran in and briefly overwhelmed their foes, but SCU soon backdropped those two out of the ring and then took turns laying a beating on Sabian.

Daniels tagged in and ran wild on Angelico until he set up for the Arabian moonsault. Remembering how he messed it up against Pentagon, Daniels paused and wasn’t sure what to do. Finally he decided to not go for it, but by that time Angelico had recovered enough to stage a comeback.

Ford got involved behind the referee’s back and gave Daniels a tornado DDT off the apron. Evans hit a really nice Sky Twister Press while standing on the mat, which is not something everyone can do. Some of us can’t do a leap frog, just ask my brother.

Kazarian got the hot tag and ran wild on all three heels by himself. He went for an Unprettier on Evans, but Angelico distracted him long enough to break it up. Evans went for a Phoenix Splash and Kazarian got his knees up. Unfortunately, Evans landed face-first on Kazarian’s knees.

The match broke down into a six-way at this point. Everyone hit a big move and Kazarian pinned Evans with the S-C-U-Later.

So, that will do it for this week. Hope everyone had a great holiday and New Year and I’ll talk to you again next week!

AEW Dark results: Joey Janela vs. Shawn Spears

Posted on by Arya Witner

The Big News —

Proud & Powerful continued their quest to become the top contending team to SCU’s AEW Tag Team titles.

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It is the last AEW show for the entire year, so since I won’t see y’all until January 7, let’s get this out of the way. Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Happy Kwanzaa, Happy Festivus, Happy New Year and safe travels to Tokyo for anyone going to Wrestle Kingdom!

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Sammy Guevara defeated Brandon Cutler

They may call him a Spanish God, but Guevara is winless in singles competition going into this match. Cutler has won zero total matches, so something has to give here. Colt Cabana joined Excalibur behind the desk this week.

Guevara got the early advantage and lounged on the mat to mock Cutler, so when Cutler reversed momentum and knocked down Guevara, Cutler lounged on the mat to mock him.

Cutler and Guevara traded topes and suicide dives. They fought onto the apron, which is the hardest part of the ring, and Guevara hit a double foot stomp to a standing Cutler.

Guevara got some cheap heat by taking the mic and saying he doesn’t care about anyone in the arena. He set Cutler up for a big move from the top rope. However, Guevara saw that’s what the fans wanted, so he jumped down and slapped on a headlock.

Guevara hit a hook kick and a springboard cutter before hitting a Shooting Star Press. We almost had a Ted DiBiase-PJ Walker finish, as Cutler crucifixed a cocky Guevara, but Guevara kicked out. Finally, the Spanish God got serious and picked up his first singles win with a fireman’s carry into a knee strike to the back of Cutler’s head.

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Jenn Decker interviewed Joey Janela. Janela said tonight it’s going down and he’s yelling timber. He told Shawn Spears he won’t remember tonight and the Bad Boy will be the one he won’t forget.

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Proud & Powerful defeated Private Party, The Hybrid 2, and Best Friends in a four-way tag match

How long will it take for this match to break down into a crazy eight-way free for all? Jack Evans was not taking this match seriously at the start, which might help explain why TH2 has yet to win a two-man team match. He started taking it more seriously when Best Friends had their way with him.

Four minutes into the match we got our answer as to how long it would take before the match broke down. Referee Bryce Remsburg made faces like there was nothing he could do. I shouldn’t bother pointing out that he could throw the match out if he’s lost control.

Everyone just kind of stopped and resumed their previously scheduled tag team match. Remsburg was allowing tags that he physically wouldn’t be able to see even if I suspend my disbelief. Santana and Ortiz pulled up Isiah Kassidy’s jersey and took turns raking his back, which led to everyone chanting Eddie Guerrero’s name when Santana did two consecutive suplexes.

Jack Evans got big heat by ripping Marq Quen off the corner, not allowing Kassidy to make the tag and actually causing him to tag in Chuck Taylor. Tags became optional at this point as you just ran in and hit moves at your leisure while the referee pointed his hand at you.

Santana and Ortiz went under the table to get some plunder and Orange Cassidy was just lounging on the conveniently placed ladder under the ring. They shoved the ladder back under. Best Friends did the Rainmaker Hug before doing a pair of topes, which was followed by an Asai moonsault by Jack Evans.

TH2 decided to attack Cassidy, so they pulled out the ladder…and Cassidy had disappeared. Cassidy came out and did a dive to TH2 while they stood befuddled outside the ring. Finally, Ortiz ran around the ring and hit everyone with his sock with the baseballs in it and in the ring they pinned Kassidy with the Street Sweeper.

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Decker did a live in-arena interview with PAC next. PAC dragged out Michael Nakazawa, who he has apparently been beating up for the last six days. In actuality, they do acknowledge that Dark is taped the same night as Dynamite and are openly saying PAC has “only” been beating him up for two hours.

PAC put a chair around Nakazawa’s neck and gave Kenny Omega his final warning to give PAC his rubber match. PAC jumped off the ropes and landed just in front of Nakazawa as a statement to Omega.

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Joey Janela defeated Shawn Spears (w/ Tully Blanchard)

First Shawn Spears and then MJF — who is the next friend to turn on Cody? We’ll find out eventually, but as for now Spears took the mic and said this is the last AEW match of 2019. He asked who was in the holiday spirit and the crowd didn’t know how to react.

Spears turned to a child and was about to tell him something that his parents told him a long time ago. His mom covered his ears and Spears seemed about to claim Santa wasn’t real when Santa Claus came out!

Santa gave the kid a high five and it was time for some pro wrestling. Spears attacked Santa at the bell, which seems to indicate he’ll be on the naughty list. Spears knocked off Santa’s hair and beard and…OH MY GOD IT’S JOEY JANELA! NO ONE SAW THIS COMING!

Janela did a suicide dive in full Santa gear as Colt Cabana tried to list all of Santa’s reindeer. Spears went for a chop, but Janela ducked and Spears laid a hard chop into the ring post.

Spears shook off the hand injury, laid out Janela, and went to the top rope for a move, but Janela rolled away. Spears ran to the other corner and went for it, but again Janela rolled away. Spears tried a third time and got the same result, so he gave up.

Janela ran and jumped off a chair onto Spears in the crowd before asking women to DM him. Janela found a man dressed as Jesus Christ in the crowd and brought him out for a brief second. I guess there is no separation between church and wrestling.

Spears and Tully Blanchard went for the spike piledriver, but Janela shoved Spears into the steps. Jesus continued to steal the show and encouraged Janela to not turn the other cheek and instead punch Tully. Spears did not allow Janela to beat up a 65-year-old man, so the match continued. Janela actually won with a top rope elbow drop.

Janela offered Spears a post-match beverage, but instead gave Spears a Stone Cold Stunner. Well if you’re gonna rip off someone, you may as well rip off the biggest star of the last 25 years. Things ended there and nothing else that may or may not have happened afterwards aired.

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The show ended with Tony Schiavone and Dasha Gonzalez promising to have a Best Of episode next week on AEW Dark. Anyhoo, that does it for this week. Take care!

AEW Dark results: Six-man tag main event

Posted on by Arya Witner

The Big News —

Dr. Britt Baker and Kris Statlander retained their top two contender spots going into their match on Dynamite tomorrow night.

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The show started with a recap video from the AEW press conference back in February, which segued into a video of The Young Bucks stating they want to prove they are the best tag team in the business. However, because they’ve lost multiple big matches, they feel disappointed because it proves they haven’t been. They’ve spent months building themselves up and have now earned a title shot tomorrow night after winning last week’s Texas Street Fight.

Nick Jackson called SCU some of their best friends in the world. Matt Jackson said despite that they will show through their actions that they are the best. They just hope that it’s not awkward when they have Christmas dinner next week.

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Joining Excalibur at the booth this week is Vickie Guerrero, who got super heat, but also a nice pop when she came out and bellowed “EXCUSE ME!” Vickie is a very nice person, but I thought she was almost completely useless on this show.

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AEW Tag Team Champions SoCal Uncensored (Frankie Kazarian & Scorpio Sky) defeated Private Party (Isiah Kassidy & Marq Quen) in a non-title match

Private Party have fallen off the tag team rankings after getting a title shot back at Full Gear. Vickie is really into them, as they have cougar stripes on their gear.

Kazarian and Kassidy traded near falls early on until slapping hands and tagging out. Kazarian later on hit a springboard leg drop on Quen and he nearly landed butt-first on Quen’s head. Speaking of Quen’s head, he then took a German suplex right on it. Excalibur said it was due to Kazarian not expecting Quen to be so light.

Kassidy got the hot tag and ran wild, including hitting a beautiful double team where he picked Sky up and Quen came off the middle rope with a bulldog for a two count. They went to the well with the double teams too many times. They sent Sly into Kazarian in the corner, but Sky gave his partner a monkey flip and Kazarian landed on his feet and took his foes out with a double clothesline.

Quen barely kicked out of a double team foot stomp/Unprettier. Finally, Quen missed a Shooting Star Press and SCU broke up the Silly String before Sky pinned Quen after the S-C-U-later.

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We got recaps of Big Swole’s win and Brandi Rhodes’ interview from last Wednesday. It was also announced that Britt Baker will face Kris Statlander in a number one contender’s match tomorrow night.

Updated Women’s Rankings:

  • 5.) Emi Sakura
  • 4.) Nyla Rose
  • 3.) Hikaru Shida
  • 2.) Kris Statlander
  • 1.) Dr. Britt Baker

**********

Dr. Britt Baker submitted Machiko

Joey Janela joined Excalibur and Vickie. Machiko is from Dallas and has been wrestling for eight years. They announced her from Tulsa, so the crowd in Garland didn’t know she was a hometown/area girl.

Machiko got a little bit of offense, but it was The Doctor from the opening bell. Baker hit a superkick and slapped on the Lock Jaw for the win.

**********

Kris Statlander defeated Bea Priestley

The top two AEW women’s division contenders were both in action tonight. First Baker won and now Statlander is defending her number two ranking. If Statlander loses, she will lose her number one contender’s match tomorrow night.

Statlander looked good until they ended up outside the ring, where Priestley dropped her with a back suplex on the ring apron, which is the hardest part of the ring. Vickie said Priestley was “good at concussions” and this led to a joke about Janela having quite a few concussions and not to alert Nowinski.

Priestley tried to put Statlander in the “head stuck in the turnbuckles” spot, which always looks stupid, and Statlander apparently agreed as she just did a headstand on the buckle and then kicked Priestley in the face.

Statlander got out the proverbial hammer and nails as she was building momentum, but The Nightmare Collective walked to their front row seats and held up signs, encouraging Statlander to join them. Coincidence or not, Priestley took over here, so she must have ripped the nails out.

Statlander kicked out of a capture suplex, nearly got the win with an Oklahoma roll and a scissors kick, but did win with The Big Bang Theory.

**********

We got a post-match promo with Statlander. She informed us puny humans that she is going to be our leader. She has to beat Baker tomorrow and says the gravitational pull we feel is the AEW Women’s title coming home to her.

**********

PAC & The Hybrid 2 (Jack Evans & Angelico) defeated Orange Cassidy & Best Friends (Trent Barreta & Chuck Taylor)

Main event time. After I complained last time about there being a 20-minute non-wrestling segment in the show, they drastically cut down this week to almost nothing. In case anyone from AEW actually reads this, I should say I enjoyed those post match promos you guys did one week.

Janela made a Jim Cornette reference by talking about “outlaw mudshows.” Someone let him know Cornette only watches Dynamite. Anyway, Cassidy was super over, as expected, and the heels got the heat when PAC put a knee square in the lower back of Chucky T.

PAC also showed what a bastard he was by not allowing Best Friends to hug when Trent made a brief comeback. This led to PAC putting the boots to his fellow former WWE’er.

This might as well have been a handicap match, as PAC did a much better job by himself than either of The Hybrid 2. Both Evans and Angelico lost the team’s momentum as soon as they tagged in.

Trent hit the half-and-half suplex and managed to make the hot tag to Cassidy. The fans nearly wet themselves. Babies were thrown in the air as Cassidy tagged in. Cassidy put his hands in his pockets to run spots with Evans and then threw a series of vicious leg kicks to PAC. That is an excellent strategy, since Pac relies on his Black Arrow to win matches and can he do it with bad legs?

In all seriousness, Cassidy used a tornado DDT on PAC and then a tope on all three heels. We got a three-way hug by the babyfaces and a top rope splash from Cassidy to Angelico for a two count. Cassidy left a legend as he tagged out. Taylor immediately got cut off and almost pinned after a 450 splash.

PAC booted Cassidy off the apron and the distraction nearly led to Taylor pinning him with a schoolboy, but PAC locked on The Brutalizer for the tap out.

**********

The show ended with Tony Schiavone and Dasha Gonzalez plugging AEWShop.com and AEW Revolution on February 29.

Final Thoughts —

The show went 65 minutes, but flowed quickly and better than last week. While the main event won’t be everyone’s cup of tea, it was a fun match that the crowd really got into.

AEW Dark results: Kenny Omega vs. Kip Sabian

Posted on by Arya Witner

The Big News —

After defeating Kip Sabian in the main event, Kenny Omega is now on a three-match winning streak.

**********

AEW Tag Team Champion Scorpio Sky defeated Jimmy Havoc and Peter Avalon (w/ Leva Bates)

Chuck Taylor and the verbose Orange Cassidy joined Excalibur at the announce desk to kick off the show this week.

Avalon dissed the crowd, which caused Bates to declare “How rude” and apologize for her fellow Librarian. Havoc is recovering from paying $20,000 in fines the last few weeks. He began the match by looking for some sort of weapon, but he was foiled.

Since he shouldn’t use a stapler, Havoc bit the calf of Sky before accidentally working together with Avalon to put the boots to him. That friendship shockingly didn’t last long, as Avalon turned on Havoc, which did not end well for him. Sky used a belly-to-belly overhead suplex on Avalon onto Havoc outside the ring and then hit a tope onto both.

Havoc finally found his staple gun, but Avalon tried to save him money by not allowing him to use it on Sky. Sky showed his appreciation by pinning Avalon after a TKO.

**********

We got a replay of the most recent Dark Order video. They segued into a recap of last week’s segment where they set up Chris Jericho vs. Jungle Boy for December 18.

**********

Jurassic Express (Marko Stunt & Luchasaurus w/ Jungle Boy) defeated John Silver & Alex Reynolds

They actually gave Silver and Reynolds a full entrance with theme music. Typically they are already in the ring. Chucky T tagged out and Dr. Britt Baker made the hot tag to take over the color commentator position. Baker mentioned that she loves Jungle Boy, which led to an inside comment about Baker’s boyfriend.

Stunt went into this match at 0-6 and Luchasaurus wasn’t much better at 1-3, so something had to give in this battle with the winless Silver and Reynolds. Baker had spoken to Luchasaurus earlier today, who said that he’s been alive for 64 million years and once upon a time he was short like Stunt, so it’s just a matter of getting a growth spurt.

Reynolds and Silver got the heat on Stunt when Reynolds yanked Stunt down by his hair. Silver and Reynolds are a solid, yet unspectacular team. They are almost the perfect enhancement team for the company, but at some point they should get a few wins just so they get a modicum of credibility.

Stunt fought forever for the tag and the crowd did pop for the big hot tag. Luchasaurus ran wild on the heels, and Stunt got his first win with a double-team cutter on Reynolds. Jungle Boy, who wasn’t in the match, is still at 0-8.

**********

We were magically whisked away to the AEW Control Center where new AEW broadcaster Lexy Nair recapped everything involving the women’s division from last week’s Dynamite. Nair is a makeup artist and DDP Yoga instructor.

They showed everything with Nyla Rose that happened during the commercial break last week. Excalibur announced that Baker, who was sitting ringside, was Adam Cole’s girlfriend, which was really funny.

**********

We got a closer look at Big Swole. She said that just means she has a big personality. She talked about how she was diagnosed with Crohn’s disease and was on the verge of death until emergency surgery where they had to remove two feet of her intestines.

Due to this disease and surgery she was told she’s not able to have kids, which led to her spiraling out of control. Despite that, her and her husband Cedric Alexander did in fact have a son together. They also showed Kenny Omega offering her an AEW contract after a match.

**********

The new AEW Women’s rankings are:

  1. Hikaru Shida (despite her loss to Kris Statlander last week)
  2. Nyla Rose (despite being suspended until 2020)
  3. Emi Sakura
  4. Dr. Britt Baker
  5. Kris Statlander

**********

Christopher Daniels was being checked out by the doctor last week when Alex Marvez ran in to ask him if he’s alright after taking another piledriver from Pentagon Jr. Daniels was pissed and swore at Marvez. He knew he was coming back early, but he wasn’t in the right mindset to beat someone as good as Pentagon.

**********

A recap of the introduction of The Butcher, The Blade & The Bunny aired, which segued into a Cody interview recap. I’m still amazed that no one even tried to rip that $100 out of the kid’s hand that Cody gave the money to.

**********

We got an MJF interview where he said he had money and with that was able to buy the assistance of Butcher, Blade & Bunny. MJF said Cody has no friends, which is why Cody has to have others pick his partners for him. He called Cody champ, before pointing out that due to him Cody will never be champ. Not entirely accurate.

**********

We then got a video package building up tomorrow’s Texas street fight with Young Bucks vs. Proud & Powerful.

**********

A new commercial for A Little Bit of the Bubbly aired. Chris Jericho encouraged everyone who buys it to post a video of them drinking it on Twitter and Instagram.

**********

Kenny Omega defeated Kip Sabian (w/ Penelope Ford)

No lie, a minimum of 20 minutes passed since the last match. Chuck Taylor rejoined Excalibur. Orange Cassidy wouldn’t shut up in the first match, so he wasn’t invited back. Sabian is obsessed with defeating The Elite. Problem is he has been unsuccessful in that quest.

Omega and Sabian worked well together and Sabian was looking good until Omega lit him up with a series of chops. Ford jumped up on the apron to distract Omega, which did the trick. Sabian used a hurricanrana inside the ring, which led to Omega rolling outside, where Ford gave him a hurricanrana too.

Taylor said that — between the look on his face and his accent — Sabian comes off like a real turd of a person. Omega came back and used the Polish Hammer.

Sabian fought out of a Dragon suplex. He hit a dropkick to the shoulder, but got caught on a springboard move by Omega and dropped with a powerbomb. Omega hit a V-Trigger and went for a second one, but Sabian pulled referee Aubrey Edwards in the way. Somehow Edwards missed Ford hitting a stunner on Omega after a series where both men almost hit her.

Sabian got a near fall with a poison rana and a PK. Omega finally hit a Dragon suplex. Ford ran in yet again and almost got her own Dragon suplex, but Omega thought better of it. Finally, Omega hit yet another V-Trigger and got the win with a One Winged Angel.

Omega took the mic, but we never heard what he said, as we were sent back to Tony Schiavone and Dasha Gonzalez, who signed off.

**********

Final Thoughts —

Nothing bad this week. The crowd was more up for the whole show than they had been in prior weeks. My only complaint would be that they could have cut out everything except the Big Swole video package and Daniels interview between the last two matches and we would have missed nothing.

AEW Dark results: Santana & Ortiz vs. Jungle Boy & Marko Stunt

Posted on by Arya Witner

The episode began with a “Last Week on Dynamite” video, which is a different way to format the show. This concentrated on the MJF vs. Hangman Page match and the aftermath with DDP.

**********

Tony Schiavone has returned from the assignment he was on last week and hosted the show with Dasha Gonzales, who was also on assignment from Dark last week. That’s a lot of assignments.

Shanna was supposed to do commentary with Excalibur, but she got laid out by Nyla Rose before the show began last week. Rose then joined Excalibur at the desk.

**********

Jimmy Havoc defeated Brandon Cutler

Neither wrestler came into the match with the most sterling win-loss record. Havoc has only won one singles match (and two overall), but Cutler has won nothing. Zero, zip, zilch, nada.

Havoc just got done paying a hefty fine for using an unauthorized staple gun at the last show, so he had to shake his head at the fans chanting for staples. Unless they were chanting for the office supply store.

They were having a good, solid match that the fans weren’t really getting into until Havoc went crazy and pulled out his staple gun. He did have a change of heart and gave it to the referee, but Havoc then kicked a field goal with Cutler’s groin. Unlike way too many extra points in the NFL this year, this one was good.

Cutler got over it and went for a chop outside the ring, but Havoc ducked and Cutler chopped the ring post.

Havoc continued to bite Cutler. Perhaps he didn’t get enough to eat at the pre-match buffet? Cutler broke out an over-the-top-rope leg drop while Havoc was laying on the middle rope, but he went down in defeat after Havoc hit the Acid Rainmaker.

After the match, Havoc stapled a check for $10,000 to Cutler’s head.

We cut to a post-match promo where Havoc told AEW management that he will do what he wants and will pay these checks every time, before stapling a check to the wall. If these fines were legit, why wouldn’t they just take the money out of the wrestler’s paycheck?

**********

The same propaganda video from last week aired, urging people to Join The Dark Order.

**********

A video package recapping Cody’s return from last week aired. The one thing people don’t seem to mention (or maybe notice) is before everyone came out they had already done a hashtag promoting The Butcher, The Blade, and The Bunny.

**********

Shawn Spears (w/ Tully Blanchard) defeated Sonny Kiss

Kiss got the biggest reaction on the show so far, just doing his normal spots. Spears mocked him by flexing his butt cheeks, which caused the fans to chant “10” at him. Spears flipped off the Sears Centre.

Moments later, Spears dropped Kiss with a backbreaker on the ring apron, which is the hardest part of the ring. Spears won with a C-4, a running Death Valley Driver, in what was essentially a squash match.

After the match, Spears and Blanchard gave Kiss a spike piledriver outside the ring.

**********

We got a commercial for A Little Bit of the Bubbly before we were magically whisked away to the AEW Control Center.

A recap of the Dustin Rhodes/Inner Circle angle from last week aired, which builds up tomorrow night’s six-man tag. Also last week, Pentagon Jr. and Fenix were complaining to Jenn Decker about losing to Trent, when Pentagon was attacked by Christopher Daniels. This leads to the Daniels-Pentagon match tomorrow night.

**********

We got a mockumentary called Jurassic Planet, looking at, shockingly, the Jurassic Express. They showed Jungle Boy getting water from a nearby brook and Luchasaurus eating leaves from a tree.

They happened to stumble across a naughty babysaurus, named Marko Stunt, who was playing with tires. The video ended with Luchasaurus holding Stunt’s hand like a father and his child while carrying Jungle Boy.

This was in lieu of a From Undesirable to Undeniable segment. Let’s face facts, Luchasaurus sitting down and talking to Cody about his career just wouldn’t be right.

**********

Proud & Powerful (Santana & Ortiz) defeated Jurassic Express (Jungle Boy & Marko Stunt)

Jurassic Express have the worst records of anyone in AEW. Jungle Boy is 0-8 going into this match, while Stunt is 0-7. I assume Luchasaurus is still getting over his injury and that’s why we’re getting Babysaurus.

Ortiz got worked over by his smaller foes, but then the heels took over with a double-team German suplex/dropkick on Stunt.

Santana lifted Stunt up in a suplex and then Proud & Powerful tagged in and out and handed Stunt off to each other while he was still in the suplex position. Stunt rolled through with a small package at one point, but he eventually was dropped at the second suplex attempt.

Stunt and Jungle Boy were set up on chairs outside the ring and Santana did a running cannonball dive off Ortiz’s back onto them.

Both members of Jurassic Express do a great job of fighting for the hot tag. This time Jungle Boy got it and got a near fall with a diving crossbody. They also used a ripcord leg drop and a flipping cutter. Stunt went up top for a 450 splash, but got distracted when Jungle Boy got pulled off the apron and was pinned after a Liger Bomb by Santana.

Sammy Guevara came out to shoot video of the three of them putting the boots to Jurassic Express. This may be footage for Being The Inner Circle. Luchasaurus did a walk-in for the save. He gave all three boots and knees and gave Ortiz a chokeslam for good measure.

Luchasaurus, who was not booked on the show, stood tall over the three men who will be in the main event of Dynamite tomorrow night. Jake Hager then walked out and traded blows with Luchasaurus. It was the Unstoppable Force vs. the Immovable Object, as neither man went down. Luchasaurus tried going for a chokeslam, but Proud & Powerful broke it up.

The Young Bucks ran down and chased Proud & Powerful and Hager off. All five babyfaces went off on Guevara, including Stunt doing an assisted Canadian Destroyer.

**********

Final Thoughts —

Now that AEW Dark has settled down into the B-show territory it was always meant to be, we can judge the show based on that. The episode was fine —  I guess I should get used to the crowd being dead, even though they were pretty hot last week. Check out the Jurassic Planet mockumentary and skip the rest unless you’re a completist.

AEW Dark results: Kenny Omega vs. Jack Evans AAA Mega title match

Posted on by Arya Witner

The Big News —

Kenny Omega retained the AAA Mega title in the main event of a show with one production issue after another.

**********

This week’s episode of Dark kicked off with Tony Schiavone in the arena, as opposed to the Control Center. Dasha Gonzales was not with him this week.

**********

Trent (w/ Orange Cassidy) defeated Pentagon Jr

Shawn Spears was the special guest color commentator this week. He did a much better job than Dustin Rhodes did last week.

Pentagon was looking to last longer than the epic 10 seconds he lasted in the Dynamite Dozen battle royal last week. It helped that it wasn’t Christopher Daniels wearing a Trent mask.

Trent did not allow Pentagon to say “Cero Miedo,” which not only gave him the heads-up in this battle, but also got him on the bad side of the fans, who really wanted to sing along. Pentagon lit up the arena and the chest of Trent with a series of kicks. Trent hit a lariat at one point and followed up later with a tope con hilo. Trent blocked a package piledriver and hit a really nice tornado DDT for a two count.

We had technical difficulties throughout this match. On three different occasions, Excalibur called several mid-match replays and we would hear the prior bump, but they never showed the replay on the screen as this was happening. Tuesdays are meant for things that should have been caught in post-production I guess.

Trent got a believable near fall with a small package, but couldn’t capitalize on the Sexy Chucky Knee. They ended up on the ring apron, which is the hardest part of the ring, and Pentagon laid out Trent with a package piledriver. Trent blocked a package piledriver in the ring and pulled off the surprising win with a Crunchie.

**********

We got a video package for Shanna, who was born in Lisbon, Portugal and has since moved to France. She has wrestled for 13 years and was the first-ever Portuguese professional wrestler to win a title in Japan. She was on the verge of retirement when WWE kept rejecting her over and over again and someone in TNA told her she looked fat compared to the other women, which were the moments she was her most down.

Shanna was going to retire in October, but that ended up being the start of the next phase in her career. She nearly broke down in tears as she explained the phone call from Kenny Omega saying she was signed. She said nothing will ever bring her down now.

**********

Alex Marvez interviewed Big Swole about her match with Shanna. Swole mocked Shanna’s story, saying that she bled and sweat to be here. She told Shanna she wasn’t ready for all this.

**********

Shanna defeated Big Swole

Excalibur and Spears said this should be more competitive than the Awesome Kong-Leva Bates match we just saw. The problem with that, of course, would be that regardless of when it was taped, this aired before that match. This is becoming the Worst of WCW Production Episode of Dark.

There is not a whole lot to say about this match. Most of the match was solid, but there were some rough spots, especially at the start, that seemed to have the crowd ready to turn on it. Swole hit a nice boot to the face that Spears had to put over. She used the hanging guillotine in the ropes until breaking after a four count.

Shanna hit a kick to the throat, which, to quote Spears, could affect the way you breathe. She hit a reverse double foot stomp off the top rope, which looked more horribly contrived than everyone who ever attempted the normal version. Shanna finally won with a dragon suplex, even though Swole’s shoulders weren’t completely down.

This match did nothing for Shanna. As excited for her as I was during the video package, I lost that excitement during the match.

**********

We were magically whisked away to the AEW Control Center, which revolved around building the Chris Jericho vs. Scorpio Sky AEW World Championship match for this week’s Dynamite.

**********

Alex Marvez did a By The Numbers segment promoting Dynamite.

88: The days since All Out when Kenny Omega lost to PAC.

0: The number of losses Chris Jericho had until he was pinned by Scorpio Sky.

8: The number of stitches Cody received after Full Gear.

**********

Awesome Kong (w/ Brandi Rhodes) defeated Leva Bates (w/ Peter Avalon)

While Avalon did his typical anti-home sports team promo, I thought about that time WWE taped SmackDown the night before Raw and talked about how Brock Lesnar beat up Mark Henry on Raw and then Mark Henry not fleeing during Raw the next night when Brock came out.

Leva was reading Justin Roberts’ autobiography. Kong didn’t care and hit a spinning back fist and a Soul Collector (Implant Buster) for the win. Avalon thought about interfering, but quickly thought better of it.

Avalon DID try to stop Kong from cutting Bates’ hair, but he got his head knocked off and Bates lost some hair.

**********

AAA Mega Champion Kenny Omega defeated Jack Evans to retain his title

Aubrey Edwards as referee got a bigger reaction than Evans, though Evans did get a pop after break dancing instead of bumping for a move. Evans did start selling for Omega, and he used his size advantage to throw Evans here and there all over the ring. Omega hit an over-the-shoulder backbreaker and a back drop where Evans almost didn’t rotate and, instead, nearly landed on his face.

Evans essentially used a Coffin Drop, but Omega caught him and dropped him with a backbreaker. Evans did the You Don’t Power Bomb Kidman and hit a rolling koppu kick before taking to the air and hitting an Asai moonsault. Once again, Excalibur called the replay that was never seen. Omega began his comeback and Evans spat in his face. Omega, irate about such a thing, booted him into the corner, which was sold like grim death. Omega did a pair of snap dragon suplexes in the ring and one on the outside.

Omega hit the ushigoroshi for a two count and hit a Buckle Bomb where Evans managed to bump out of the ring and fall in over the bottom rope. Omega got the knees up on a 450 splash and hit a knee strike and a Tiger Driver 98, but Evans kicked out. Omega finally hit the V-Trigger and a One Winged Angel for the pin.

**********

Final Thoughts —

The show went 75 minutes this week, which is at least 15 too much. They should have saved Shanna’s match for another night.

Anyway, thank you for reading, have a happy American Thanksgiving and, while you’re at it, check out my new podcast The History of Wrestling in 60 Seconds, which debuts on YouTube Wednesday night!

AEW Dark results: The Young Bucks vs. Strong Hearts

Posted on by Arya Witner

The Big Takeaway —

The Young Bucks picked up a win, which in real life was about an hour or so before Matt Jackson got powerbombed through the stage on Dynamite.

**********

Tony Schiavone and Dasha Gonzales were back to introduce this week’s AEW Dark episode. Excalibur’s partner at the broadcast booth this week was Dustin Rhodes. He still painted half of his face, even though he wasn’t wrestling.

**********

Best Friends (Trent Barreta & Chuck Taylor w/ Orange Cassidy) defeated Private Party (Marq Quen & Isiah Kassidy)

During their entrance, Quen danced right up next to the Atlas Security guard, trying to get him to crack, but he kept a completely straight face. It did look like Orange Cassidy almost cracked during his entrance, however.

The match started with Dustin doing a hard sell for Dustin Rhodes merchandise at AEWShop.com and tickets that you can buy at AEWTix.com. He also mentioned he’d be back in about a month from the injury Jake Hager gave him.

This match, in my opinion, really showed that if it wasn’t for Orange Cassidy, Best Friends would be heels. A lot of their actual work comes across as heelish. And even though this was a match between babyface teams, they played heel.

Private Party disposed of Taylor and Trent and began posing on the ropes. Orange Cassidy got up on the apron for the big thumbs up spot, even though it was with the wrong team. Best Friends hit a combo Eat Defeat/German suplex on Kassidy for a near-fall.

Taylor bit on Kassidy’s shoe, which is just a dirty thing to do. Best Friends hit a sloppy looking Doomsday superplex for another near fall. Quen got the hot tag, much to the love of the handful of people paying attention. They may not have been paying much attention, but Quen flying all over the place got the crowd rocking.

The match broke down and Best Friends used their size and superior strength to lay both members of Private Party out on the floor. Kassidy kicked out of a Sexy Chucky Knee in the ring, and Private Party hit the Silly String.

Dustin was pointing out the lack of tag team rules enforcement. AEW had gotten better about that a few weeks ago, but they just were ignoring them for the most part here.

Trent rolled to the floor to get out of the way of a Marq Quen dive. Orange Cassidy stepped in between the two to stop Quen…so Quen just jumped over him and laid out Trent. Quen ended up stuck upside down in the corner and Best Friends did their hug before getting the surprising win with Strong Zero.

Despite this, Private Party will still face Proud & Powerful (Santana & Ortiz) tomorrow night.

**********

AEW Women’s Champion Riho & Dr. Britt Baker defeated Kris Statlander & Big Swole

This was the debut of Statlander — and Swole was hoping she’d help her pick up her first win.

Swole’s offense revolved around running over and through Riho, while the champion did her best to dodge, duck, dip, dive, and dodge around her. Statlander tagged in with Baker and obviously has some work to do, but she is pretty good for her experience level. Much like AEW in general, I’m really interested in seeing how well she progresses over the next few years.

Baker got the heat on Big Swole, despite Baker being a babyface and Swole being a heel. Riho tagged in and got superkicked, which allowed Statlander to tag in with what was no longer a hot tag, but would have been a minute earlier when The Doctor was still in there.

Riho got beat on for barely a minute when Baker got the hot tag. Statlander gave Riho a back suplex on Baker and both heels got on top of them while they were still stacked on top of each other for The Most Illegal Pinfall Attempt To Ever Get A Two Count.

Baker gave Statlander a Diamond Cutter that somehow led to Statlander flipping forward. She kicked out of that and a Riho double foot stomp. Statlander went for an Oklahoma Roll and rolled Baker all over the ring, which barely got a two count. Statlander then gave The Doctor a spinning Michinoku Driver for another two count. If nothing else she is gonna be dizzy by the end of this.

Somehow Swole accidentally elbowed Statlander, even though Statlander was almost as far away from her as I am. Baker dumped Swole and got the submission with the Lock Jaw.

I know everyone loves Britt Baker, but there are times where she’s really green and this was one of them.

**********

We got a new edition of From Undesirable to Undeniable, this one with ring announcer Justin Roberts. Roberts said he felt undesirable when WWE let him go in October 2014. It was all he ever had known and did in his life and now he had to do something else.

Roberts started working in television and kept himself busy by doing announcing for just about everything he could. He started watching Being the Elite and fell in love with wrestling all over again. He greatly appreciated how much everyone greatly appreciates him.

**********

It was time to once again be magically whisked away to the AEW Control Center. Since AEW doesn’t have a new major PPV to plug, they recapped the MJF promo and angle with Cody and Wardlow from last Wednesday night.

We also saw the brawl between The Young Bucks and Proud & Powerful and Scorpio Sky pinning Chris Jericho.

**********

The Young Bucks defeated Strong Hearts (T-Hawk & El Lindaman)

Schiavone made sure to say this was taped before Dynamite, so this was before Matt Jackson got powerbombed through the stage last week. Dustin and Excalibur were joking that they and referee Rick Knox were ageless and Excalibur said he was actually the third Excalibur and they replace him every couple of years. He really should have said he regenerates. Anyway, onto the match.

T-Hawk chopped Nick Jackson at the bell and Nick got tired of having his chest turned raw — so him and Matt took T-Hawk out with a series of double-team moves. Lindaman attempted to use a suplex on Nick in the corner, but there wasn’t enough room so Nick took an STO into the turnbuckles instead.

Matt, who crashed into Nick seconds later, had enough room to take a suplex. Nick, again, fired up after chops. Matt tagged in and this was where the rules got forgotten for several minutes as all four men were able to do whatever they wanted. After at least two minutes, Knox finally began counting. He got all the way to three before giving up. Matt pinned Lindaman with a Meltzer Driver.

The match wasn’t as good as it sounds on paper, but better than it was if I told you they only had about eight minutes. Anyway, that does it for this week. Even with The Young Bucks wrestling here, AEW Dark is still being cemented as the B show.

AEW Dark results: SCU & CIMA vs. TH2 & Kip Sabian

Posted on by Arya Witner

The Big Takeaway —

Kip Sabian & The Hybrid2 may want to find new trios partners, as they fell to 0-2 as a three-man team after a loss to SCU & CIMA in the main event.

**********

Welcome to a special Friday edition of AEW Dark, a show so sudden and surprising that AEW’s own Twitter page had nothing about it five minutes before the show. Their first tweet about it was literally just as the show began.

**********

Justin Roberts introduced Arn Anderson as a special member of the announce team tonight, joining Excalibur and Goldenboy. Unfortunately, Arn only announced the first match.

**********

Hikaru Shida defeated Big Swole

Goldenboy broke out the “Rolodex of words” when talking about Arn Anderson’s “prowess” in the ring. Anyway, Swole tried using her size to bully Shida early, but Shida got the early advantage. It was highlighted by her jumping off of a chair outside the ring and landing a knee strike to Swole’s chin.

Swole missed a series of strikes and leg sweeps and hit a headbutt, followed by a flatliner for a two count.

Shida missed one knee strike, but hit on a second attempt after ducking a Rainmaker. Swole kicked out of that, but she didn’t kick out of the second running knee, as Shida picked up the win.

*********

Starting this week we are getting quick 30-second post-match backstage promos with the winners.

Shida cut a promo and said she came here to show Japanese style and is really happy to be able to do so. She was asked about the Riho-Emi Sakura Women’s Championship match at Full Gear tomorrow night and she picked Sakura to win after stating that it was a hard choice.

**********

Nyla Rose & Leva Bates defeated Shazza McKenzie & Shalandra Royal in what was essentially a two-on-one handicap match

Whatever you think of the man, it was a huge step down when Arn Anderson was replaced by Chuck Taylor. Bates was really happy to have Rose as a partner and we didn’t have Peter Avalon in their corner. Excalibur said Rose wanted this to be a two-on-one handicap match. AEW management wouldn’t allow it, so she was assigned a partner.

McKenzie threw a leg kick that Rose no sold and then got run over. Royal tried and fared no better, as she ran into Rose’s foot. Bate reached for a tag, but Rose ignored her.

The babyfaces teamed up for a double suplex, but it didn’t work. Bates went for a blind tag, but Rose glared her down, so Bates channeled The Nutty Professor and chanted “Hercules.” It did lead to 10 seconds of babyface offense, but they got cut off again.

Taylor asked if you could be disqualified for not leaving the ring on a 10 count if you’re getting your butt kicked. Actually on WWF Raw for the Sega Genesis, back in 1994, you could be counted out if you were being beaten up outside the ring, even if there was nothing you could do. It did lead to many arguments at the Witner house over “not allowing the other one to get back in the ring.”

Back to the match, this was an extended squash. Rose even threw Royal into Bates when Bates tried again for a tag. Rose laid Royal and McKenzie out with a double Death Valley Driver, stacked them up on top of each other, and pinned them both after a Swanton Bomb. Bates had given up by this point and was reading her book.

So, Bates gets her first win in a match she did nothing in.

***********

Alex Marvez asked Rose why she didn’t tag out. Rose told him she didn’t have to. She eliminated 10 people in the Casino Battle Royale and gets no respect from the company because none of that was included in her record. Why didn’t she tag out? “Because I’m Nyla Rose, the Native Beast,” Rose said.

**********

We were magically whisked away to the AEW Control Center, where Tony Schiavone and Dasha Gonzalez previewed Full Gear. Gonzalez was magically wearing the clothes she wore for last week’s Dark, which seems to indicate this is last week’s Control Center, just with a quick voiceover including the Tag Team title match.

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We got a video package for the Chris Jericho-Cody AEW World Championship match at Full Gear.

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We didn’t get a new edition of From Undesirable to Undeniable, which made me sad.

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AEW Tag Team Champions SoCal Uncensored (Scorpio Sky & Frankie Kazarian) & CIMA defeated TH2 (Angelico & Jack Evans) & Kip Sabian

AEW has a reputation of having a bunch of new young wrestlers, but the person with the least experience in this main event was Sabian, who just passed nine years in the ring.

Speaking of Sabian, him thumbing Sky in the eye (followed by an Evans pump kick) is how the heels got the heat. CIMA got the hot tag and ran wild on all three, hitting dropkicks on everyone. He countered a springboard move with a dropkick as well. CIMA slammed all three of his opponents on top of each other and hit a springboard knee to Evans, who was on top.

This match did a better job than most in enforcing the rules of tag team wrestling. There were a couple blips on the radar, but nothing as blatantly awful as usual. SCU hit the S-C-U-later on Sabian and CIMA finished him off with the meteora. They briefly turned up the lights in the building, which was definitely a weird look.

**********

The show abruptly went off the air after a commercial for Full Gear tomorrow night.

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Final Thoughts —

This definitely had the vibe of a last-minute show. With that said, it was still better than both the Pittsburgh and Charleston episodes. Enjoy Full Gear tomorrow night!

AEW Dark results: Joey Janela & Jimmy Havoc vs. Jurassic Express

Posted on by Arya Witner

The Big Takeaway —

Shawn Spears picked up his first singles win and started a feud with Joey Janela.

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The show started with Tony Schiavone introducing Spanish announcer Dasha Gonzales (the former Dasha Fuentes) as his newest co-host. Speaking of changes, this week Excalibur was joined at the booth by Maxwell Jacob Friedman.

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Shawn Spears (w/ Tully Blanchard) defeated Michael Nakazawa

I know they were on Dynamite last week, but it’s weird to not have The Librarians on the show. This was Nakazawa’s first match for AEW since facing Alex Jebailey back at Fyter Fest. MJF asked the Facebook meme question about if olive oil is made out of olives and coconut oil is made out of coconuts, what is baby oil, which Nakazawa slathers himself in, made of?

Spears had the early advantage until Nakazawa pulled out the baby oil. Spears was not happy with getting it on him and tried to wipe it off onto referee Aubrey Edwards. Both Spears and Tully Blanchard slipped and bumped due to the baby oil.

Spears used the chop to much success. For the finish, Spears blocked Nakazawa’s attempts at using his thong for an offensive maneuver and got the pin with a slingshot brainbuster.

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Allie & Sadie Gibbs defeated Mercedes Martinez & Big Swole

Gibbs and Swole started the match doing the running shoulder blocks at each other, which Gibbs won by finally taking Swole down.

They began running the ropes and we never found out what happened, as the director felt it was more important to show a fan sitting at ringside. This happened a second time later on when Allie was going for a sliding elbow to Martinez, but instead we saw the fans.

Gibbs picked Allie up and dropped her on Martinez, but did it in the “wrong” direction, as she dropped Allie vertically, across the face and chest. Martinez and Swole hit the H Bomb on Gibbs.

Gibbs ignored the beating she got, shoved Swole across the ring, and casually tagged in Allie. After the producer didn’t show Allie’s offense, the heels decided that was enough and cut her off to get the heat. We got the expected four-way, which culminated with a giant dive spot with Gibbs doing a cartwheel into a dive over the top rope.

Everyone hit a big move on everyone, including the Allie Valley Driver, and Gibbs pinned Swole with a moonsault. This was rough in spots, but it accomplished its goals at the end of the day.

**********

They formally announced Dr. Britt Baker vs. Bea Priestley for the Full Gear Buy-In show, which included a video package building it up. Baker called Priestley a piece of sh*t.

After that we got a recap of the Chris Jericho-Cody angle from last Wednesday.

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Up next was our weekly From Undesirable To Undeniable segment where Cody interviewed Jimmy Havoc. Havoc said he feels undesirable a lot of the time now and all you have to do was look on his Twitter feed.

Havoc did look back to a moment when he was three years old which started him down the road he’s on. He started feeling undeniable by wrestling the way he wants to now and said getting signed shows that he is good enough.

Honestly, this was the weakest of the four segments, but that’s mostly because the three before this were really good.

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Joey Janela & Jimmy Havoc defeated Jurassic Express (Jungle Boy & Marko Stunt)

Stunt put on a Luchasaurus mask, but he took it off as the match began. The announcers said he was 5’3″, which I am calling shenanigans on.

A couple people tried to start either an ECW or a CZW chant, but it didn’t pick up steam. Havoc and Jungle Boy were displaying fine technical wrestling until Havoc decided to gnaw on Jungle Boy’s wrist. Jungle Boy hit a beautiful high dropkick. Stunt did a suicide dive — diving between Jungle Boy’s legs to Havoc — and Jungle Boy hit a beautiful Asai moonsault on Janela.

There were a lot of people shown not paying attention, which is weird since this was the last match of the night, so if you’re not gonna watch or care, why not leave early? Havoc bit the neck of Stunt, which led to an announcer discussion about vampires.

Stunt made the hot tag to Jungle Boy, which the fans did pop for. Jungle Boy got tired of his team being bit, so he bit Havoc, which made the crowd happy. Jungle Boy gave Janela an atomic drop and an inverted atomic drop, both of which Janela sold like sure death.

A series of big moves saw Janela hit Jungle Boy with a big lariat as the last move. Jungle Boy ducked the Acid Rainmaker, but it led to Stunt nearly being pinned with a Michinoku driver.

Havoc pulled out a staple gun, but Janela blind tagged himself in and took the staple gun. Janela turned on his partner by stapling him in the head. Despite that, Havoc still helped his partner win, as Janela pinned Stunt with a top rope package piledriver.

After the match, Havoc took his staple gun, glared at Janela, and walked away.

**********

We were whisked away backstage, where Janela was smoking a cigarette after the match. Tully Blanchard approached him and said he wasn’t happy with how Janela treated him the last time they saw each other. Spears attacked Janela and appeared to force cigarettes down Janela’s throat, but the camera was turned away and the show came to its conclusion.

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Final Thoughts —

This was the first time the show really felt like Velocity. Unlike prior episodes that had some degree of stardom, this was the midcard and under showcase.

AEW Dark results: Darby Allin vs. Jimmy Havoc vs. Jack Evans

Posted on by Arya Witner

The Big Takeaway —

Darby Allin got back in the win column, picking up the win in a falls count anywhere triple threat match.

Today is my 36th season premiere (aka my 35th birthday). It is never too late to send me a large sum of cash as a gift.

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Dustin Rhodes & Sonny Kiss defeated QT Marshall & Peter Avalon (w/ Leva Bates)

Marshall was featured in an interview segment with Cody Rhodes last week and now debuts with his first AEW match this week on Dark.

Avalon cut his usual pre-match promo running down the local sports team, in this case being the Pittsburgh Pirates. Thankfully for me they won’t be in Buffalo anytime soon. Bates did tell Avalon to “shhhh,” continuing her possible face turn.

Kiss was born in December of 1993, which is when Dustin Rhodes was already in the business five years (and was WCW United States Champion to boot).

The heels got the heat when Bates grabbed Kiss’ foot and Avalon took his head off with a running kick. When Kiss was reaching for a tag, Avalon grabbed his foot and threw it down into the splits before locking on a chinlock, which at least explained why the splits would hurt here and not every other time Kiss does the splits.

Bates tried to interfere, but she got caught when she tried showing Rhodes her book. Rhodes placed her in the corner and sidestepped Avalon when he went running after The Natural. Rhodes hit the Final Reckoning on Avalon for the win.

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Emi Sakura defeated Allie, Penelope Ford, and Sadie Gibbs in a four-way match

We had a four-way collar-and-elbow tie-up, followed by a four-way Greco Roman knuckle lock that Gibbs got the best of. In fact her knuckle lock on Allie and Sakura was so bad that Ford even sold it.

Sakura did a dosey-doe with referee Rick Knox and held his arm out long enough that he accidentally elbowed Ford. Sakura slapped a surfboard on Ford. Allie snuck in and tried to cover Sakura, but she was smart enough to let go of the surfboard and kick out.

Ford and Gibbs formed a brief alliance, but it broke down when they fought over who got to pin Allie. Excalibur claimed the fans were chanting for Sakura. They were doing no such thing. However, the fans did boo the Blonde Girl Alliance as all three teamed up on Sakura briefly.

Sakura came back and gave all three a Vader Bomb for a simultaneous two count on each. Gibbs threw a clothesline so high that Ford didn’t even bother ducking. Sakura pinned Ford with a Tiger Driver. They showed some of the least interested fans applauding.

**********

This week’s From Undesirable to Undeniable with Cody Rhodes saw him interviewing Maxwell Jacob Friedman.

MJF said in his wrestling career he never felt undesirable, but he did when playing football as a kid because he was the only Jewish kid and the other kids didn’t like a Jewish person taking their spot on the team. In fact, his teammates bullied him by throwing quarters at him. MJF said the kid who bullied him (whose name they bleeped) is a drug addict who dropped out of college, while he is famous and hangs out with the coolest person in the world.

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We were magically whisked away to the AEW Control Center where Tony Schiavone previewed Dynamite. This segued into a video building up The Lucha Bros vs. SoCal Uncensored in the finals of the AEW Tag Team title tournament.

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Alex Marvez interviewed Kip Sabian about his upcoming six-man tag. On Wednesday night, Sabian will team with Jack Evans & Angelico to face Kenny Omega & The Young Bucks. Sabian said he won the very first singles match in AEW history and he has the best record of everyone who hasn’t been on Dynamite yet. His plan is to beat The Elite and become The Elite. Sabian said he hated Marvez.

**********

Darby Allin defeated Jimmy Havoc and Jack Evans in a triple threat falls count anywhere match

Main event time. This match was not sponsored by Cracker Barrel, so there was no Cracker Barrel barrel for Allin and Havoc to destroy.

Not that he had a ton of competition, but Allin had the best reaction of anyone who came out on the show tonight. Allin and Evans both were going about 125 miles per hour and it was up to Havoc to slow them down. Havoc held up a chair as Allin came through the ropes with a suicide dive. For once I’m not being facetious — Allin did a suicide dive and Havoc was almost like “Hey, look at this chair!”

Havoc did a dive over the guardrail and into the crowd, which gave Jim Ross and Excalibur a chance to plug AEWTix.com, saying that the only way to have Havoc dive over the railing and into your lap is to go to the show.

Evans, who has been wrestling for over a decade, gave a suplex to Havoc on the ramp, got up, and played to the crowd for a few seconds before making the cover. Havoc did a diving elbow drop onto Allin on the floor and, seconds later, Evans did a flipping dive onto both of them.

We fought back to the ring and Evans threw some chairs in. The fans chanted for tables, so Evans threw more chairs into the ring. Havoc gave Allin the old Cesaro superplex where Allin was standing on the ring apron and Havoc stood on the middle rope and lifted him for the superplex.

Havoc used a Tiger Driver 98 on Allin on a chair. Evans broke the pin up, so Havoc threw a chair in his face. However, Havoc learned that if you live by the chair, you die by the chair. Evans dropped him with a side suplex on the edge of a chair and then hit a 450 splash, but only for a two count.

We finally got our table, but it was used for Havoc to give Evans a piledriver through. As he went for the cover, Allin came out of nowhere (or the corner turnbuckle) with a chair-assisted Coffin Drop on Havoc and covered Evans for the pin.

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Final Thoughts —

Not sure what happened to the loud crowd in Pittsburgh for Dynamite, because the Dark crowd was mellow. The main event was not as bat crap crazy as you might expect considering the stipulation, but that made it better.

AEW Dark results: Young Bucks & Rhodes brothers in eight-man action

Posted on by Arya Witner

The Big News —

Joey Janela, Nyla Rose, and Dustin Rhodes all picked up their first wins.

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– Tony Schiavone introduced the show from the AEW Dark Control Center, ran down the matches, and announced that joining Excalibur for tonight would be guest commentator Taz.

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Joey Janela defeated Brandon Cutler

Janela in back-to-back Dark matches, as he main evented last week against Kenny Omega and is opening up this week’s show. Both men were looking to pick up their first win in AEW.

Last week I made a joke about Kenny Omega and Janela’s unsanctioned match being a catch-as-catch-can mat classic — well I want to believe Janela read my joke and took it to heart. This week, in a match held under standard rules, Janela showed off his wrestling skills. Like with Mick Foley, his technical skills aren’t going to carry him, but it’s good to know he has them.

Cutler is a bit too bland in look and personality to stand out, but — in a weird way — it makes him stand out when he’s in the ring with someone like Janela or MJF (like he was on Dynamite’s debut).

With that said, this was a solid opener. Janela hit a suicide dive at one point and then did a lap around the ring and leaped off the stairs with a forearm strike. Cutler came back and went for a springboard move, but Janela dropped him stomach-first on the top rope and hit a top rope brainbuster for the win.

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It was time for From Undesirable to Undeniable, with Cody sitting down with QT Marshall aka Michael Cuellari. Cody met him at ROH, and he was a super nice, super friendly guy who then helped produce All In. Then he created a documentary called The Wrestler in an effort to get a job in WWE.

Marshall said he was hired in Ring of Honor and was immediately disliked by the locker room. He injured his neck almost immediately and decided to get out of the ring. Finally, he moved to Georgia and went all in on wrestling and now he’s here. He’s medically cleared and Cody told him he’d be wrestling in Pittsburgh this week.

It was a really good segment.

**********

Nyla Rose pinned Leva Bates (w/ Peter Avalon)

Both women have zero official wins, despite Rose winning the women’s Casino Battle Royale at All Out. Avalon came out with Bates and cut a promo on how rude the fans are here in the City of Brotherly Love.

The fans did not appreciate being talked down to by the Librarian, who gave a history lesson. He compared the nation’s capital moving from Philly to D.C. to Bryce Harper moving from D.C. to Philly, since the Nationals flourished after Harper left for the Phillies. He also ripped on Rocky Balboa and the Eagles defense. Bates told Avalon to shhhh, which got a couple cheers.

Avalon threw some books in the ring for a distraction at the start, which did work, but Rose flung them back at him. Bates kept going for a crucifix pin, but she couldn’t get Rose over. Rose hit a Death Valley Driver, but Avalon jumped on the apron to show the referee a passage in the book he’s reading.

Bates nearly got a roll-up win, but Rose kicked out and then heaved Bates over the top rope and onto Avalon.

Back in the ring, Rose picked up the win with the Beast Bomb.

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Schiavone ran down the lineup for tomorrow night’s Dynamite and we got a video package for The Dark Order.

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After their match last week, Alex Marvez interviewed SoCal Uncensored. They did not have an update about Christopher Daniels. Both Scorpio Sky and Frankie Kazarian cut fiery promos about the Lucha Brothers and vowed to win the AEW Tag Team titles.

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Jenn Decker attempted to interview PAC last week, who told her to move. PAC, covered in blood, said he has done nothing but help Jon Moxley since he got here. He left Kenny Omega laying out for him and this was the thanks he gets?

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Up next was a video package promoting Chris Jericho and The Inner Circle.

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The Young Bucks, Cody & Dustin Rhodes (w/ Brandi Rhodes and MJF) defeated Private Party, CIMA & T-Hawk

CIMA got the best of Cody early, so he rolled to the outside to regroup. Brandi gave him a kiss, then Cody turned to MJF and started leaning in, which was funny. Back in the ring, Cody unnecessarily did a diving tag to Dustin, which cracked Taz up. Dustin has been wrestling 31 years. T-Hawk, Nick Jackson, and Private Party were all born after Dustin debuted.

This match was more about the comedy than the eight-men trying to have a **** bout. Matt Jackson used a rolling Northern Lights suplex on Marq Quen. Nick was going about 200 MPH, hitting kicks and dives and X-Factors on all four opponents. They turned around and hit all their big moves on Nick and that would have been it, but Cody broke it up.

CIMA and Nick reversed each other over and over as T-Hawk was setting up for a chop. He eventually went for it on Nick, but Nick reversed it one last time and CIMA took the chop.

Dustin tagged in and went at top speed, hitting powerslams on Quen, CIMA and T-Hawk. Isiah Kassidy ran in, but Dustin held up his finger and asked for a quick timeout to take a breath. Kassidy was nice enough to do it and then ran in for his powerslam.

We had the giant dive spot that ended with Brandi diving when MJF hopped up on the apron. MJF showed why he’s the best heel, as the referee got distracted again, so he went for a dive, but instead kept running the ropes and wouldn’t dive. CIMA laid him out, so Cody laid him out, so T-Hawk laid him out, and The Young Bucks laid him out.

The Young Bucks and Rhodes brothers set their foes up on all four corners and hit Unnatural Kicks (the former Shattered Dreams) on all four and Dustin pinned T-Hawk with the Final Reckoning.

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Final Thoughts —

Probably the weakest of the three AEW Dark episodes, even though the show was fine. Thank you for reading. Talk to you again next week!

AEW Dark results: Kenny Omega vs. Joey Janela unsanctioned match

Posted on by Arya Witner

The Big News —

– Kenny Omega picked up the win over Joey Janela in the unsanctioned lights out main event.

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– The episode started with a pre-show interview where Kenny Omega approached The Young Bucks about why he doesn’t have a match on Dynamite. Matt Jackson recommended an enhancement match, so Omega demanded a lights out match with Joey Janela instead. Matt told him to take care of himself.

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Kip Sabian defeated Sonny Kiss and Peter Avalon (w/ Leva Bates) in a triple threat match

This was the only pre-show bout, while the other two took place after Dynamite ended. Avalon came out and got cheap heat by dissing the Red Sox and Bruins for their recent losses. The crowd loved Sonny Kiss. Sabian looked at Kiss as if he’s never seen anyone like him before.

This was a fun, athletic three-way that did a great job of getting the fans going for the rest of the show. Avalon, who had been flung out of the ring earlier, finally got in and hit a back kick to Kiss and a dropkick to Sabian. Avalon laid in the chops to the pectoral region of Kiss. Sabian hurt his finger as he hit Avalon with a cannonball senton splash.

Kiss hit a double STO and got a near fall on Avalon. Avalon got a near fall on Kiss when Bates hit him with a book, but Sabian pinned Avalon after Deathly Hollows.

**********

The Hybrid Two (Jack Evans & Angelico) & The Dark Order (Evil Uno & Stu Grayson) defeated CIMA & SoCal Uncensored (Christopher Daniels, Frankie Kazarian & Scorpio Sky)

Evans grabbed an SCU sign out of the crowd, brought it into the ring, and then flung it into the crowd. Not seen was that a fan grabbed it out of the air with one hand, which, if you watch, is why the fans cheered a few seconds after he did it.

It was hard getting the crowd into it, as this was hour three of the show. Daniels worked well with Grayson and it quickly broke down into an eight-way, but like in all good matches, the eight-way free for all broke down into a tag team match.

The heels got the heat on Daniels. Daniels laid out Evans with a sit-out powerbomb and made the hot tag to Kazarian. He ran wild on the heels, which included jumping over the top rope with a hurricanrana to Grayson, who gave a spear to Evil Uno. Sky hit a pair of dives onto the foes.

Everyone hit everyone with a big move, including Daniels hitting Evil Uno with Angel’s Wings. The finish saw Uno distract the referee, with The Hybrid Two hitting a double low kick to Sky and Evans pinning him with a backslide.

This is SCU’s first loss.

**********

– We had a segment where Cody Rhodes interviewed referee Aubrey Edwards.

Edwards said she’s only been doing this for two years. She first thought this could be her career when she did the Mae Young Classic. WWE eventually told her she wasn’t needed, which made her feel undesirable. She realized what she could be doing different and the sky is the limit. She said if she had to stop refereeing tomorrow, she’d have left a happy person.

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– Next up was highlights of the Private Party-Young Bucks Tag Team title tournament match and then the post-main event angle from Dynamite.

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Kenny Omega defeated Joey Janela in an unsanctioned lights out match

Even though Omega won this bout, it does not go towards his win/loss record since it’s an unsanctioned match, so he technically still has only one singles win in AEW.

To the shock of the fans — despite the unsanctioned stipulation — this match was an epic catch-as-catch-can bout as both men pulled out technical skills unseen on American television since the ECW Guerrero-Malenko classics in 1995.

Of course, I am completely full of it.

Janela quickly threw a chair at Omega’s face ala Sabu and filled the ring with chairs. Omega did a dive out of the ring and smashed his legs on the guardrail. Both the referee and the doctor at ringside checked on him. With a ladder already pulled out as well, Omega pulled out a table and hit Janela with a missile dropkick to the back. Omega hit a dragon suplex on the ring apron, which is the hardest part of the ring. He teased a One Winged Angel off the ring steps, but Janela fell behind and hit a snap German suplex off the steps.

Janela propped a table upside down between the steps and the ring and a ladder propped up in the corner of the ring. Omega got thrown multiple times into the ladder, including taking a German suplex into it.

Janela countered a V-Trigger with a clothesline. Janela hit a superplex that did not look very pretty. Omega blocked a side Russian leg sweep off the apron, which caused Janela to fall flat on the ground, which would have happened even if he hit it.

Jim Ross randomly mentioned that after production moves in, usually tickets become available even for a sold out show, which, true story, is how I bought my ticket for this Dynamite episode.

Janela set Omega up on a table and he climbed to the top of the ladder. Unfortunately, he went for everything and got nothing, as Omega moved out of the way and Janela went crashing through a table with a frog splash. Omega hit a Lo-Down for a two count.

Omega finally hit a V-Trigger, turned Janela ass over teakettle with a clothesline, and used the Death Rider for a two count. The crowd didn’t pick up on Omega using Jon Moxley’s move, but JR and Excalibur did. Janela side stepped an Omega charge and sent the Best Bout Machine crashing through the table set up outside earlier.

Janela set up four chairs back-to-back in the ring and that was his bitter end, as Omega slammed him off the top rope on top of those chairs, then nailed the V-Trigger and a One Winged Angel on a chair for the win.

So, Omega is back to his winning ways and that will do it for this week. As for the YouTube audience, it grew throughout the show, starting at 11,227 viewers and reached a peak of 31,572 for the climax of the main event.

Thank you all for reading and I’ll see you again next week!